Musings

My life could be summed up with the phrase: "Right is always right and wrong is always wrong." Admitting my humanity was only to acknowledge the times I acted in my flesh, ie. sinned. I was a spiritual person, trapped in a body of flesh. There was a dichotomy of flesh versus spirit. I was to continually kill anything associated with the flesh: any desire I had whether it was physical or emotional. The monastic life was wrong because it was catholic - but there were definitely times life felt as though I was living that way. I was taught that anytime I felt the urging to scrifice self, that I was "acting in the spirit." In other words, that was God talking. I was also taught that I was an incredibly selfish being and that any attempt at self preservation, self respect, etc was a demonstration of that selfishness.